How you can help the @AKcitymission this Christmas with #TwitterMissionNZ

This year, the lovely @katjnz and I had been thinking of charities we could get behind, and help other People Of Twitter do the same.

City Missions. They do amazing work with some of the outcast, overlooked, and needy in our communities. They’re always in need of stock and volunteers, but never moreso than at Christmas.

We thought it would be a cool idea to give back to our community – both the Twitter community, and Auckland – by offering our services: We want to help you connect with the Auckland City Mission.

What they need:

  • Non-perishable foods such as pasta, tinned fruit, canned tuna, tea and coffee, powdered milk, juice, rice etc
  • Unwrapped gifts for kids – try to choose things that don’t require batteries, aren’t toy guns, would be good for outdoor play and aren’t expensive (can’t give one child an expensive gift and not others!)

What we’ll do:

  • Kat and I will come to your house on Saturday the 30th of November and collect your donations, and take them to the Mission’s collection point in time for the Christmas rush.
  • When we see you, we’d like to get a wee photo with you so everyone can follow the collection day on Twitter, but that’s entirely up to you.

What you need to do:

Thank you all so much for your support and encouragement – and if you aren’t in Auckland, you no doubt have some amazing local charities doing this work in your community. Maybe you could run a #TwitterMissionNZ in your neighbourhood? We’d love to hear about it if you do!

Cate and Kat.

The Best Kiwi Tweets of October 2013

Hello!

Yes, we skipped a month. But now we have October’s tweets to enjoy! Here you go…

We played Auckland Monopoly (again)
‏@_GlennCollier community chest card: ‘ you have won second prize in a beauty contest collect $10, but your parking spot cost $30’
@takapunani Farro Fresh has run out of kale, quinoa and acai. Lose $150.
@pcuser42 You’re on a bus on the Harbour Bridge. Go back three spaces.
@watershitdown It is your birthday Collect $10 & your underwear from each player
@cjlambert Mt Eden prison riot. Get out of jail free.
@nickeee_tweets The rent is $400 but because you are competing with 50+ people to live there you have to offer to pay $550

Getting from A to B
@Vegrandis Omg I can’t see out of my bus windows!! I guess I’ll get out at the stop that “feels” like my area.
@WayneLikesFood I’m going to walk home from work. It’ll be good exercise. If I get mugged I’ll have something to talk about when people ask about my weekend
@HayleyHeartbrk Woops, too busy seething with resentment forgot to get off the bus

Technology though
@guywilliamsguy The happiest people I’ve seen are Fijian towl administrators and I’m like why are YOU so happy!? You don’t even have an iPhone!? God.
@wimon_song Just received the photos I emailed myself more than a month ago. Thanks internet.
@Megapope You’ve all given me so many great new insults for using at people I don’t like on Reddit. Which is pretty much most of them.
@takapunani “twitter is better with friends”. go home twitter you’re drunk
@rednz Just watched a girl’s makeup application tutorial on YouTube and it feels like that time you found out magic/santa wasn’t real.

Auckland
@rosiecd The Len Brown story was way more interesting when I thought Bevan Chuang was an Asian man.
@yohohos I wonder if Lorde can afford to buy a house in Auckland yet.

DOGS!
@thelittlepakeha Just let dogs in. OMG SO EXCITING OMG OMG HAS THE HOUSE CHANGED WHILE THEY WERE OUTSIDE LET’S FIND OUT OMG OMG IT HASN’T WOAH!
@VickyRF When @TroyRF has angry outbursts at video games, dogs quickly look to me as if to ask ‘is he mad or fake-mad?’ I nod, they return to sleep.

Stay Classy
@smownin Has anyone checked if there’s a correlation between mass murderers and where they shopped before they murdered? Is it pak n save?
@jtclassic Just had a very drunk 67-year old man on his birthday call me to play a request for his mistress! #Tuesday
@NZ_JB Ante-natal class #4: what to do with the pooping machine when it comes out.
@Kiwi_Chatter Had a shower, sent my bum to some people on snapchat, defrosted chicken for dinner. Busy, busy, busy.
@sophiealiceryan Two handfuls of mini marshmallows is not a breakfast of champions, adult life is hard.

Old Mout Cider And the winner is…

@takapunani because, heck, she’s made it twice in one month. Boom. Please follow @OldMoutCider to collect your delicious prize!

Five things that make me irrationally angry

There’s plenty of things out there to make you genuinely angry – poverty, child abuse, atom bombs – but what about first world anger?

Here’s a list of the stuff that gets my knickers in a knot.

1. SUV-owning city dwellers.

Bless, some of you are my friends, but I stand by what I’m about to say: There is no decent reason why you need an SUV. They’re big. They’re annoying. You’re not safer in them. In fact, they not only have a higher chance of killing anyone they hit, but also a much higher chance of rolling. Plus, you know, gas guzzling and shit. Oh, and while you’re super-excited about being able to see everything else on the road, no one can see around you, so they’re gonna drive a bit crazy.

The worst of it, though, is people who use a big car as a status symbol. What’s so bad in your life that you have to use an oversized vehicle to make you feel important?

See also: People who have those stick figure families on their cars. If Satan had a car, it’d have a stick figure family on it, and you’d be the mum.

2. People who rip popular content for their YouTube Channel.

I know some people do this for curation reasons, and if you have a YouTube partnership, you can claim and block those videos, but it still seems really, really rude for people to use other’s videos to drive subscriptions to their own channel.

See also: People who have exactly the same quality video as every other one but say “BEST VERSION”. Lies. All lies.

See also: Thumbnails and titles that tell you it’s a particular video, but when you click on it’s it’s a reaction video.

See also: YouTube annotations begging for thumbs up and subscriptions. Ugh.

See also: People who rip Vines to Facebook. But Vine really does need to up their game.

3. Everything about Pak n Save.

I used to work there, which is probably where it all started. I love how cheap everything is there. So cheap. But you know what I don’t love? Yellow lighting. Fruit and vege mazes. No shopping baskets. How everyone stops to chat at the end of EVERY. SINGLE. AISLE. OKAY. I HAVE TO STOP WRITING THIS NOW BECAUSE MY EYEBALLS ARE FILLING WITH BLOOD.

4. Cyclists who wear lycra at cafes.

Dude, I can see your privates. I’m just sitting here, trying to enjoy my eggs bene and you’re putting your fluoro crotch in my eyeline. Okay so *maybe* you’re in the middle of a 150km race and you stopped off at Mission Bay circa 62nd km to get a flat white and some french toast, but chances are you’re out for a ride with your lycra-clad mates and you’ve made a conscious decision to refuel in public. None of us want to see the outline of your sweaty man-appendage.

Next time I have brunch, I’m wearing a hot pink pair of leggings, I’m going to give myself atomic camel toe and I’m going to stand in front of you until you’re done.

5. Halloween.

More commercial crap so that we can spend money we probably don’t have buying things we don’t need. Also, encouraging your kids to ask strangers for lollies is redic. I get that dressing up is fun, but we still have a chance to not make Halloween a thing in New Zealand. There’s still hope for us. Don’t buy into the consumerism.

Also if any of your little shits turn up at my house begging for chocolate, I will deliberately scar them for life.

I own hot pink leggings, remember.

 

Five of the best Lorde: Royals covers

I like a good cover almost as much as I like a good remix or mashup, and I like Lorde. A lot.

So what better than five awesome covers of Lorde’s hit song Royals?

Walk Off The Earth

Sugababes

Loopstation

Pentatonix

Bonjah

If you’ve got a favourite Royals cover, post it in the comments!

Bonus: Here’s The Love Club EP!

Sinead O’Connor’s open letter to Miley Cyrus is amazing

I love this letter from 90s pop icon Sinead O’Connor to Miley Cyrus after Miley said she was inspired by O’Connor. It’s scathing and loving and beautiful.

Real empowerment of yourself as a woman would be to in future refuse to exploit your body or your sexuality in order for men to make money from you.

Damn straight.

 

Dear Miley,

I wasn’t going to write this letter, but today I’ve been dodging phone calls from various newspapers who wished me to remark upon your having said in Rolling Stone your “Wrecking Ball” video was designed to be similar to the one for “Nothing Compares”… So this is what I need to say… And it is said in the spirit of motherliness and with love.

I am extremely concerned for you that those around you have led you to believe, or encouraged you in your own belief, that it is in any way “cool” to be naked and licking sledgehammers in your videos. It is in fact the case that you will obscure your talent by allowing yourself to be pimped, whether it’s the music business or yourself doing the pimping.

Nothing but harm will come in the long run, from allowing yourself to be exploited, and it is absolutely NOT in ANY way an empowerment of yourself or any other young women, for you to send across the message that you are to be valued (even by you) more for your sexual appeal than your obvious talent.

I am happy to hear I am somewhat of a role model for you and I hope that because of that you will pay close attention to what I am telling you.

The music business doesn’t give a shit about you, or any of us. They will prostitute you for all you are worth, and cleverly make you think its what YOU wanted.. and when you end up in rehab as a result of being prostituted, “they” will be sunning themselves on their yachts in Antigua, which they bought by selling your body and you will find yourself very alone.

None of the men oggling you give a shit about you either, do not be fooled. Many’s the woman mistook lust for love. If they want you sexually that doesn’t mean they give fuck about you. All the more true when you unwittingly give the impression you don’t give much of a fuck about yourself. And when you employ people who give the impression they don’t give much of a fuck about you either. No one who cares about you could support your being pimped.. and that includes you yourself.

Yes, I’m suggesting you don’t care for yourself. That has to change. You ought be protected as a precious young lady by anyone in your employ and anyone around you, including you. This is a dangerous world. We don’t encourage our daughters to walk around naked in it because it makes them prey for animals and less than animals, a distressing majority of whom work in the music industry and its associated media.

You are worth more than your body or your sexual appeal. The world of showbiz doesn’t see things that way, they like things to be seen the other way, whether they are magazines who want you on their cover, or whatever.. Don’t be under any illusions.. ALL of them want you because they’re making money off your youth and your beauty.. which they could not do except for the fact your youth makes you blind to the evils of show business. If you have an innocent heart you can’t recognise those who do not.

I repeat, you have enough talent that you don’t need to let the music business make a prostitute of you. You shouldn’t let them make a fool of you either. Don’t think for a moment that any of them give a flying fuck about you. They’re there for the money.. we’re there for the music. It has always been that way and it will always be that way. The sooner a young lady gets to know that, the sooner she can be REALLY in control.

You also said in Rolling Stone that your look is based on mine. The look I chose, I chose on purpose at a time when my record company were encouraging me to do what you have done. I felt I would rather be judged on my talent and not my looks. I am happy that I made that choice, not least because I do not find myself on the proverbial rag heap now that I am almost 47 yrs of age.. which unfortunately many female artists who have based their image around their sexuality, end up on when they reach middle age.

Real empowerment of yourself as a woman would be to in future refuse to exploit your body or your sexuality in order for men to make money from you. I needn’t even ask the question.. I’ve been in the business long enough to know that men are making more money than you are from you getting naked. It’s really not at all cool. And it’s sending dangerous signals to other young women. Please in future say no when you are asked to prostitute yourself. Your body is for you and your boyfriend. It isn’t for every spunk-spewing dirtbag on the net, or every greedy record company executive to buy his mistresses diamonds with.

As for the shedding of the Hannah Montana image.. whoever is telling you getting naked is the way to do that does absolutely NOT respect your talent, or you as a young lady. Your records are good enough for you not to need any shedding of Hannah Montana. She’s waaaaaaay gone by now.. Not because you got naked but because you make great records.

Whether we like it or not, us females in the industry are role models and as such we have to be extremely careful what messages we send to other women. The message you keep sending is that it’s somehow cool to be prostituted.. it’s so not cool Miley.. it’s dangerous. Women are to be valued for so much more than their sexuality. we aren’t merely objects of desire. I would be encouraging you to send healthier messages to your peers.. that they and you are worth more than what is currently going on in your career. Kindly fire any motherfucker who hasn’t expressed alarm, because they don’t care about you.

Sinead

Miley’s responded by poking fun at Sinead’s mental health. Stay classy.

 

A lot of people don’t like O’Connor’s letter, calling her “matronising” and that no one asks for this level of criticism. Amanda Palmer’s weighed in, you can read her open letter here.

Meet The Dumpling Sisters

dumpling-sisters

Amy and Julie Zhang are Chinese Kiwis who live in London. Online, they’re known as The Dumpling Sisters and star in their own YouTube videos about delicious fusion food, their mum, and adventures in the big city.

I was introduced to them when they were rallying for votes because they’d made the finals of Jamie Oliver’s Search for a Food Tube Star. They are the only finalists to represent NZ out of more than 250 entries worldwide!

It’s awesome to see Kiwis fly, so have a watch of their video and click the ‘like’ button on YouTube to show your support in the competition.

It closes this Monday, 23 September, at 11 am NZ time. Please let your friends and family know about this and lets see these lovely ladies take out the competition!

Check out their YouTube channel for more adorableness and good food!

A message of hope from the New York City Ballet

This is beautiful.

To commemorate September 11, and to encourage New Yorkers to look forward with hope, the city’s Ballet Company released this video at dawn on September 12, 2013.

It was filmed at sunrise on the 57th floor of 4 World Trade Center in lower Manhattan.

MUSIC 
Spiegel Im Spiegel by Arvo Part

CHOREOGRAPHY 
After the Rain by Christopher Wheeldon

DANCERS
Maria Kowroski
Ask la Cour

VIDEO
Directed by Davi Russo
Edited by Tim Zeigler
Produced by Radical Media
Executive Produced by Gregg Carlesimo
Executive Produced by Maya Brewster
Produced by Logan Luchsinger